I've already posted it on my other blog and instagram, but I can't keep a family scrapbook without including some of the happiest news I've ever received—another pregnancy! And a GIRL, no less!
The point is—I was praying for peace no matter the gender, and by the time the ultrasound finally came around (seriously, it felt like forever), I really did feel at peace with either.
Then, during the ultrasound, the tech initially said the baby looked "girl-ish"; she wasn't quite sure yet. Ryan said later he was thinking, "That will not do for Erica!" But even in that moment—with the possibility that we wouldn't know for certain—I still felt peace. As the appointment progressed, the tech became more and more confident that it was a girl, and the radiologist confirmed that it was "definitely a girl!"
It literally took a few days to sink in. I guess it still is! Pulling out the little set of girl clothes that I have helped it feel more real. With Trenton, we chose not to find out the gender, because we had absolutely no preference either way. I still treasure getting to hear Ryan say "It's a boy!" in the delivery room.
But the strange thing about not finding out the gender is that for 40 weeks, you imagine your baby as either a boy or girl. In a way, you imagine it as both. After I had Trenton, it took me a couple of months to put away the small set of girl clothes I had accumulated—not because I was disappointed in the slightest with having a boy first, but simply because I still wanted the little girl I had imagined as being a part of our family. (Reading this, I realize it may not make sense to anyone but me. Heavens, I doubt it makes sense to Ryan! But it's a part of my motherhood journey, so I'm including it all anyway!)
But now it's time for our girl! And I'm so grateful we'll have her to wear those clothes and to round out our home.
On another note, the boys are adorable about the baby! Trenton is so excited for when he can feel the baby kick. They regularly talk about where the baby's carseat will go in the backseat of the Carolla. They both are more than willing to give the baby pats and tell her they love her, and they've taken a greater interest in other babies, especially newborns, we see. The other day Chase found a pacifier and said, "This for our baby!" He also likes to say he's excited for when the baby "pops out!" (Hoping it's not nearly as dramatic as that!) At 2 1/ 2, I'm surprised at how well he seems to get it. It's going to be such a different experience this time around, having kids who are actually old enough to know what's going on when we bring our newborn home!
Last random note - It was our first ultrasound where the tech didn't say, "Wow, you have a very active baby in there!" And I even ate a candybar beforehand!